two guys go to a beach in their brand spanking new swimsuits. one dudes doing really good with the ladies, they're coming up to him, talking, swirling their hair around...
dude joe goes to dude bob and says : "hey man, whats your secret?"
He really didn't expect an answer, but the guy replies with "You gotta get a potato and put in it your swimsuit my guy"
So dude joe goes to a market and buys a potato, puts it I his swimsuit just like his friend said, and made his way back to the beach. The last thing he expected was for women and children pointing, laughing, crying, passing out...
So he jogs over to his friend and says "hey, whats the deal? didn't I do it right?"
bob then says "bruh... your suppose to put it in the front -.-"
Hi my name is Carmen Winstead. I'm 17 years old. I am very similar to you... Did I mention to you that I'm dead. A few years ago a group of girls pushed me down a sewer hole to try and embarrass me. When I didn't come back up the police came. The girls said that I had fell and everyone believed them. The police found my body in the sewer. I had a broken neck and my face was torn off. Send this message to 15 people after you read the whole message if you value your life! A boy called David received this message. He just laughed and deleted it. When he was in the shower he heard laughing... MY LAUGHTER! He got really scared, rushed to his phone to repost this message... But he was too late. The next morning his mum entered his bedroom and all she found was a message written in his blood saying, "You will never have him back!" No one has found his body yet... because he is with me!... Send this to 15 people in the next 5 minutes if you don't want your fate to be the same as David's. Your time starts... NOW! The story is true you can research it on google
Hi my name is Carmen Sandiego. I'm 37 years old. I am a international jewel thief just like you. Did I mention that you can't find me? A few years ago a group of kids tried to stop me from stealing the statue of liberty. When I stole it the police came. The kids said I was a bad guy and everyone believed them. The police found my organization V.I.L.E. with my communication watch. I had a red hat and my finger prints were rubbed off. Send this message to 15 people after you read the whole message if you value your valuables! A boy called David received this message. He just laughed and deleted it. When he was in the shower he heard foot steps... MY FOOTSTEPS! He got really scared, rushed to his phone to repost this message... But he was too late. The next morning his mum entered his bedroom and all she found was a message written in invisible ink, "You will never have his xbox back!" No one has found his xbox yet... because it's is with me!... Send this to 15 people in the next 5 minutes if you don't want your fate to be the same as David's. Your time starts... NOW! The story is true you can research it on google.org
anonymous user· reply
2022-04-20 13:56 · 2022-04-20
Hi my name is AAAAUUUGGHH Winstead. I'm(AAAAUUUGGHH 17 years old. I am very similar to you. Did I mention to you that AAAUUUGGHH a group of girls pushed me down
My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead– murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. I can't take this anymore. I liv
Comments (40)
Why do they call it oven when you of in the cold food of out hot eat the food
i love my wife
What smells like shit and sounds like a bell?
Dung
what's a racist's favorite drink? a slurpee.
WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?
TO KNOCK ON A GAY GUYS DOOR.
KNOCK KNOCK.
whos there?
THE CHICKEN MF.
Why did the sauce packet go to the pretty ladies? Because it was feeling saucy! >:3
nice one lmao
two guys go to a beach in their brand spanking new swimsuits. one dudes doing really good with the ladies, they're coming up to him, talking, swirling their hair around...
dude joe goes to dude bob and says : "hey man, whats your secret?"
He really didn't expect an answer, but the guy replies with "You gotta get a potato and put in it your swimsuit my guy"
So dude joe goes to a market and buys a potato, puts it I his swimsuit just like his friend said, and made his way back to the beach. The last thing he expected was for women and children pointing, laughing, crying, passing out...
So he jogs over to his friend and says "hey, whats the deal? didn't I do it right?"
bob then says "bruh... your suppose to put it in the front -.-"
Lmao
how is this supposed to be funny
cuz it look sus
like he do be shittin his suit at a beach
but i guess poop jokes are behind you... lol XD
i love slurpees😤💪
deez nuts
😂😂😂💀💀💀
What bear is most conscending?
A:a pan-duh
lmao
What's the difference between a BLACK GUY and a SPEED BUMP?
You slow down for a speed bump!!!!!!
IF THIS OFFENDED YOU IN ANY WAY, IM SORRY.
I thought it was funny.?
that is f*cking hilarious!!!! It took me a minute to get it but now I'm going to tell it to my brother!!!!!!
what do you call a cow with no legs
Lmao
Jetdarc
wrong
q: What do you call a new hardcore/dubstep competition?
a: https://www.audiotool.com/track/m3xhfugka7c/
Hi my name is Carmen Winstead. I'm 17 years old. I am very similar to you... Did I mention to you that I'm dead. A few years ago a group of girls pushed me down a sewer hole to try and embarrass me. When I didn't come back up the police came. The girls said that I had fell and everyone believed them. The police found my body in the sewer. I had a broken neck and my face was torn off. Send this message to 15 people after you read the whole message if you value your life! A boy called David received this message. He just laughed and deleted it. When he was in the shower he heard laughing... MY LAUGHTER! He got really scared, rushed to his phone to repost this message... But he was too late. The next morning his mum entered his bedroom and all she found was a message written in his blood saying, "You will never have him back!" No one has found his body yet... because he is with me!... Send this to 15 people in the next 5 minutes if you don't want your fate to be the same as David's. Your time starts... NOW! The story is true you can research it on google
Hi my name is Carmen Sandiego. I'm 37 years old. I am a international jewel thief just like you. Did I mention that you can't find me? A few years ago a group of kids tried to stop me from stealing the statue of liberty. When I stole it the police came. The kids said I was a bad guy and everyone believed them. The police found my organization V.I.L.E. with my communication watch. I had a red hat and my finger prints were rubbed off. Send this message to 15 people after you read the whole message if you value your valuables! A boy called David received this message. He just laughed and deleted it. When he was in the shower he heard foot steps... MY FOOTSTEPS! He got really scared, rushed to his phone to repost this message... But he was too late. The next morning his mum entered his bedroom and all she found was a message written in invisible ink, "You will never have his xbox back!" No one has found his xbox yet... because it's is with me!... Send this to 15 people in the next 5 minutes if you don't want your fate to be the same as David's. Your time starts... NOW! The story is true you can research it on google.org
Hi my name is AAAAUUUGGHH Winstead. I'm(AAAAUUUGGHH 17 years old. I am very similar to you. Did I mention to you that AAAUUUGGHH a group of girls pushed me down
withdecay
My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead– murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. I can't take this anymore. I liv
just a question any of you know what a anti joke is if not LOOK IT UP
ground beef XD
what kinda music scared ballons?
pop music!
scares*
HAHAHA! the best dadda joke yet
"i live at 308 negra arroyo lane", never thought i'd hear that again lol.
my dad.
my name is sewer. I'm currently in jail because some girls pushed someone into me and they died.
What kind of cars do Jedi's like?
a To-Yoda!